Here's my top 5 list:
5. Bradley Grobler: When I saw this name on the Platinum Stars' team sheet, I immediately thought boxing. A rather skinny chap with a bad Cristiano Ronaldo hairdo steps onto the field!
4. Serge Djihoua: Chiefs made noise about this man when he was first scouted, but my early impression was of a soldier with forgettable football skills, and his appearance didn't help either.
3. Sam Pam: He came to Pirates during the height of militarianism in Nigeria, and one couldn't help but imagine this gentleman was seeking asylum in football, and we all ate humble pie as he marshalled the Pirates defence admirably.
2. George Koumantarakis: When I first heard of this man with an unusually long surname, and being ignorant about everything Greek then, I thought of the first 5 letters and immediately felt soccer was going to the dogs, literally.
1. George Mofokeng: You don't get too many Goerges in our football, and hearing the name obviously brought doubts to my mind, but he has stuck to the necessary and continues to do the job for his team.
How about these:
1. Merikani Mpangi
2. Marco di Giovampolo
3. Botende Eshele
4. Makweni Ayala
5. Innocent Mayoyo
6. Nascent Nkhwashu
7. Wayne Sandilands
8. Deshi Baktawer
9. Thomas O'Nkono
10. Avril Phali
11. ...and, yes... Energy Murambadoro!
And, no, there is no truth to the rumour that I dislike goalkeepers, but I think its good that players' names are written at the back of the jerseys and keepers spend most of the time facing the action on the field otherwise it would be like the Tower of Babel and some strikers would be distracted by the scrabble-busters on these keepers' backs!
6. Andile Jali: sounded like a street vendor who specializes in old clothes
5. Elias Pelembe: sounds like someone who is out on bail for housebreaking
4. Rudzani Ramudzuli: this name has weight more like Zinedine Zidane type of a player. I was scared when Chiefs played Leopards for the first time
3. Patrick Apataki: sounds like a 'masalamose', a magician who after touching you at the mall all your money turns into papers [so they say]
2. Thabo Nthethe: sounds like a pastor of those churches who wear white clothing you normally see in awkward places like alongside a busy highway underneath a tree, below bridges and are usually a congregation of less than 6
1. Moses Spandeel: sounded more like a new Sparleta product... first time I heard this name I went like: we are finally having an alternative to Creme-soda...
